I've been expecting a recorded delivery letter. On Thursday I got home to find a note through the door saying an attempt had been made to deliver it but nobody had been at home.
No problem, I thought, I'll arrange for it to be delivered on Friday when W was due to be in all morning, and I phoned our local office.
No way - nobody was answering the phone.
OK, I thought, I'll use the online service.
No way - their was no option to request delivery on Friday.
OK, I thought, I'll arrange delivery for Saturday. W agreed to stay in while I was at my sewing course. I filled in all required fields and got an email confirming the package would be delivered on Saturday.
Only it wasn't. So now I have to make a dash to the post office after work one day (not easy, next week!) to pick it up.
What really disturbed me was my reaction. I got really angry. I knew I was angry. Both features are very unusual for me. I didn't know what to do with my anger and i felt very disturbed by it. It was out of proportion. I didn't feel in control. A big part of me feels I would rather carry on turning my anger on myself than experience these horrible feelings in future.