Wednesday, 10 September 2008

Counselling



An update.

It's going really well. I trust my new counsellor and like the way she works. We have touched on a lot of things - some very painful, some very scary - and she helps me feel safe in that. She uses therapeutic touch - not massage, just sitting close, or a hand on my arm, or a hug. All very helpful when I am in "scared child" mode. She's very like D in that, and that helps me not to miss D quite so much.

We talked yesterday about brain development where there is a lack of nurturing. That helped; helped me to understand why I react as I do, why I am in a constant state of mental arousal, alertness. We also did some work on calming those instincts. She's helping me develop better self-soothing skills (something children in nurturing environments learn through example). Yesterday we worked on some visualisation and a mantra. We developed some practical strategies, which I have begun today to put into place.
I'd forgotten my strategy of changing out of work clothes when I get home, and into "leisure" clothes. Have begun that again; it's very helpful.
I'm trying to do some daily yoga / exercise type activity - sometimes a massage, sometimes a class, sometimes a DVD. That also provides a space for me, a time to calm my mind.
I'm also taking time at points during the day to go away from everyone and use a mantra or a visualisation, just to calm my mind, find some peace and quiet.

It's good, and helpful. I'm hopeful about this. She lets me know she accepts all of me, and that makes me feel able to show more than I might.

5 comments:

Lareve said...

Glad new counsellor is working for you- must be hard bringing up difficult things with new person but hoping they will give you some tools to move on.

Disillusioned said...

Thank you lareve. It is hard starting over, but seems easier with J than it has been in the past. Part of that is, I think, that I am just ready for this, and a lot of the things I need to talk about are very near to the surface now. the other part is just that she is such a good match for me.

Rainbow dreams said...

all sounding good there - some helpful stuff for us all too, love, K,x

Silvawingz said...

I am glad it is going well - Thanks for your positive comments on my blog - they do help.

Disillusioned said...

Thanks Katie.

And silva - glad if it helps.