I was due to have a meeting tomorrow which should have marked some kind of closure for me, by going through my clinical notes and identifying aspects about which I have concerns. This was agreed at the meeting I had with BLPT staff back in October. It has not happened till now due to a combination of factors, as much my responsibility as theirs. I was not ready to look at my notes for a long time. Combining diaries caused more delays, with holidays affecting schedules. Tomorrow's meeting has had to be postponed (quite understandably) due to the illness of one of the people I was due to meet with. It has been rearranged for next week, and I have no problem with this - except that I want this to be done, finished, ticked off.
I probably could have asked for the meeting to go ahead with just one of the two BLPT staff I am due to meet with. I'm sure that would have been possible. But I would prefer to have it with both. So I am willing to wait. But that willingness doesn't alleviate the anxiety I am feeling at the moment.