Saturday, 6 December 2008

Promises




Dr K replied to my self-discharge, telling me he "would find it very difficult to discharge me" and would ask his secretary to send me a further appointment. Well, that's OK because he is not discharging me - I am discharging myself.
He also said he hoped I was not "displacing" my anger onto him. I tried to explain I am not angry with him but do not feel I can trust him because he has made promises which have not been carried through. It's not that I feel he has broken those promises himself, more that he should not have made the promises in the first place.

7 comments:

marcella said...

Keep on being a weeble!

If Dr K feels it is important for you to have ongoing support from his Trust, then he'll have to guarantee that you'll actually get it! There's nothing in your letter that could be interpreted as being angry with him, just the inability of those around him to allow him to carry out his promises.

La-reve said...

So Dr K has taken it personally,
Well not much of a surprise there. I guess he is worried in case it reflects back on him. I think everythign you wrote was valid and reasonable. Are you going to have an appointment with him?

Disillusioned said...

Thanks Marcella. I'm trying to wobble rather than fall. You're right about the need for support to be provided not promised - but, in reality, it is now much too late for the trust to provide that. I don't think I could believe in its reliability enough to engage with it were it to be offered.

La-reve - I tried very hard not to make my letter personal towards Dr K as I believe he did want to help - just that he did not have the time / ability to "make it so". No, I won't be having another appointment with him - my GP is in agreement with my discharging myself from mental health services. I see her regularly and trust her judgement with regard to my medication. I'll leave BLPT to help those who better fit its services.

Mandy said...

Hi C

Whatever you chose to do is your decision. I do feel that you weren't left with much of a decision to make.

As for going to an appointment or not. Nothing is carved in stone. You can avoid any more contact with services, if that is what feels or seems best, you can change your mind at the last minute. Is nobody's choice but yours.

Writing this purely so you don't feel pressured to do anything except whatever you think is best for you whilst fully appreciating that when you are being neglected, disrespected or got at, you are less inclined to want to go down the routes that led you there.

x

Polar Bear said...

Yes, I see what you mean. If he promised you and didn't follow through, I would not be able to trust him either.

What do you want to do now - are you still going to self discharge?

Disillusioned said...

Hi Mandy
Thanks for the comment.
Polar Bear - thank you too. I'm set on self discharge at the moment, especially since my GP supports my decision. It's hard to see how anything positive would come of my continued involvement with BLPT now. I'm going to carry on seeing my counsellor, and my GP, and keep working through stuff as best I can.

theMuddledMarketPlace said...

in life we do what helps and we ( generally ) don't do what always causes grief

long as you and your GP can sort a good back up plan,
for really-horrible-times-when -it-all-goes-pearshaped,

then
tiptoe away quietly
after all,
it's not as if they can't fill the apt for someone else
who really wants it