Tuesday, 30 September 2008

Tired

Feeling very tired and (hence) low tonight. Stressful meeting at work yesterday didn't help - tempers running high, more demands, implied criticisms. Lessons went well; good responses from pupils and some difficult situations managed. Worked with some staff after school to help them with computer issues - we made progress.
Following my session with J last week I am working hard at maintaining a protective bubble around myself. At times it is pushed and stretched, but I can see the benefits. It's very much about self-protection from some elements which I can find toxic and stressful. It's a good mechanism for me to use. It doesn't come naturally to me, however, and the self-doubt and self-criticism still intrude. (Most of the time I don't need external criticism - I can provide my own self-criticism with little aid from others, and with the help of historical voices).
Tonight my aim is to chill out a bit and get an early night. Then get through tomorrow and make the most of my consultancy day. I have an interview on Friday - to confirm (I hope!) the work I am doing already. I have masses of paperwork I need to get together before that - and that is stressful to me. As I keep telling staff, I don't "do" paper very well; I am much better with electronic files.
Tiredness is in the air and I need to find ways of maintaining my positive approach. That's easier in the classroom than outside of it. Pacing myself is an important consideration too.
Ah well.

3 comments:

La-reve said...

Hope you managed to get your early night. Positivr that you can put into practice some of the techniques j is teaching you. But perhaps think of it as a bubble that can be put in place when needed and not somewhere to hide out from the rest of the world 9if that makes sense- if not just ignore me)
Hope you get some positive tommorow and all goes well on friday. x

Mandy said...

Hi C

Sorry yesterday was a heavy challenge for you.

Not sure if it affects you but the time of year is having a strong impact on me.

I usually go into hibernation mode from now until March. Sure I was a hedgehog in a previous life.

Hope you felt a bit more energised today and get time to relax too

:>)

Disillusioned said...

Still very tired. Have survived the week though, and enjoyed lots of it. Classroom stuff is good, it just all seems to take it out of me. And yes, Mandy, the time of year definitely affects me. I have a light lamp which I need to be using - but the time I need to use it is the middle of the day, and that isn't practical!