Just got in, having left home this morning at 7.30.
Long day of teaching. Two hour after school meeting. Then straight on to elder daughter's school to find out about sixth form options.
Good moments - hearing how wel she is doing, having other staff praise her.
And the not so good moments...
My closest friend at work, someone who like me struggles with depression - fell apart today.
I held her while she cried.
For a while I coped with it by doing - helping to arrange things (as far as I could - not very far).
Tonight I am being and it is hard being where I am. In her I saw, today, where I was, where I am so close to being, and that is scary. I heard her saying things I know I feel, believe, deep down in myself in the darkest times and places. I hurt for her, I hurt with her, and there is nothing, absolutely nothing, I can do. There's a lot I want to do, but nothing I can do. Seeing her hurting, feeling, the rawness and despair of it all - I know where I am, where I have been and where I will be again.